Happiness After Infidelity

HOW TO INFIDELITY PROOF YOUR MARRIAGE

The Power of Passionate Monogamy™

"Passion is not something that is given (or taken) away
by another but is created from within." – Suzie Johnson

Here’s the beautiful truth…

Without passion, a relationship is hard WORK.  

Passion is what keeps monogamy so sweet. It’s the secret sauce to every successful and fulfilling relationship. Without passion – a monogamous relationship loses its pleasure and becomes a prison.

Passion evokes playfulness.

It is sincere, but not serious. When it comes to passion, words are just decorative placeholders. It cannot be explained. It must be experienced. You can’t just think about it. You must live it, taste it and breathe it for yourself. And yet, when it is absent, you know. How do you know? Because your life feels incomplete... like a puzzle with missing pieces.
                                                                         
Passion is what makes sex spectacular. Without passion, sex becomes basic reproduction. Passion is the energy that allows us to connect like humans…not like robots.

Now let me ask you a question:

Before today... has anyone ever taken the time... to fully explain to you... all the elements, strategies and  facets of love, friendship, passion, adventure and romance... that it takes... to design a relationship that is automatically "infidelity—proof"... because it matches and mirrors both partner's deepest desires... exactly the way they want it to?

If not, then today is your day.

     WHAT IS PASSIONATE MONOGAMY™ ?

Simply put: It’s the feeling of being satisfied and fulfilled by “one”.

I believe learning how to create Passionate Monogamy™ becomes both the prevention AND the cure for in helping couples avoid having to deal with infidelity in their relationship.  

In other words...If you have already experienced infidelity in your relationship, then Passionate Monogamy™  can help prevent it from happening again.

But also, if you've been lucky enough to have avoided the painful challenges of betrayel or infidelity, then learning how to keep the fire burning by learning how to have Passionate Monogamy™ in your relationship will help make sure everything stay that way.

ABOUT THE SECRETS

The secrets you are about to learn are a part of a process that’s on the leading edge of relationship technologies. They have emerged from my 15 years of marriage AND nine years of coaching couples through the conflict, crisis and confusion brought on by infidelity (and other challenges).

I promise you… even if you are happy with your relationship…knowing how to create Passionate Monogamy™ will deepen it. And even if you are struggling with your relationship, Passionate Monogamy™  could very well transform it.

In the next few minutes…

I am going to give a crash course on some of my secrets on creating Passionate Monogamy™. And how YOU can use these secrets to infidelity proof any relationship.

I suggest you sit back and relax, and allow me explain (all the way through) how to use these secrets to create the relationship of your dreams, so neither you or your partner ever needs to reach beyond it for anything.

HOW TO "INFIDELITY—PROOF" YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Generally speaking… men and women cheat for different reasons.

Men For: Variety, attention, affirmation and adventure.

Women For: Emotional fulfillment, romance and a sense of feeling desirable.

So here’s the BIG question:

What stops so many people from going after (and getting) all the love, sex & romance they want... in “one” relationship?

That’s a terrific question. Here’s my answer:

I believe there are two main reasons.  Reason number one is… they really don’t know what they want.  And reason number two is… they DO know what they want. However, they don’t know how to get it within their primary relationship.

My “Happy-Ever-After” Formula For Relationship Happiness

What is YOUR definition for Relationship Happiness?

That’s another great question. Here’s my definition: Relationship Happiness = wanting what you have and having exactly what you want in your relationship.

Simple isn’t it. (But not always so easy to achieve.)

In order to create Passionate Monogamy™,  couples must learn to create win-win agreements in seven major categories.  In other words, Relationship Happiness is the  result of both people having exactly what they want in each of these seven areas.

1. Sex
2. Love (& Belonging)
3. Romance
4. Security
5. Freedom
6. Power
7. Fun

Today we are going to focus on just the first three: Sex + Love + Romance. Why? Because we know that most instances of infidelity is caused when there is a “lack” or “void” in one (or more) of these three areas. (whether real or imagined)

When couples are able to successfully combine: Love + Sex + Romance... Sexual Happiness is the result.  As you can imagine, very few people stray from relationships in which they are experiencing real sexual happiness.

NOTE: The Road to Infidelity is paved with people who have good sex (and even great sex) within their primary relationship.  This is NOT the same as sexual happiness. (more on this a little later)

Did you know?

Thousands of married women have confessed to me that… “Deep down, they are not satisfied with the quality and / or quantity of romance and emotional connection they get to experience with their partners.  And many of them have told me they feel powerless to do anything about it.

And almost as many men have confided in me that… “While they are happy with their partners, they are not satisfied with the amount of  variety, adventure and fun they experience at home.  But most of them are willing to just accept it as the “price” of being in a committed relationship. 
                            
WHAT HE WANTS VS. WHAT SHE WANTS

                                                                                   
He wants more sex.
She wants more passion.

He wants more spontaneity.
She wants want more sensuality.

He wants more adventure.
She wants more romance.

WHAT IS SEXUAL HAPPINESS?

To help you better understand the difference between having a good sex life and enjoying real sexual happiness…let’s look at the differences between what Sexual Happiness IS and IS NOT.

• It IS NOT About frequency – it IS about freedom.
• It IS NOT about techniques – it IS about timing.
• It IS NOT about sex – it IS about passion.
• It IS NOT about orgasm — it IS about satisfaction.
• It IS NOT about convenience — it IS about creativity.
• It IS NOT about foreplay – it IS about TOTAL arousal.

Sexual happiness…is sexual creativity and expression that is more than skin deep… its soul deep. It’s about creating desire for each other — rather than desire for sex.  It IS NOT about having more sex; It IS about having more passionate, erotic, intimate, profound sexual connections with each other.

If you would like to “Infidelity Proof” YOUR relationship, you will each have to learn “how” to create sexual happiness together by correctly combing love + sex + romance.

LEARNING FROM MISTAKES

In school, most of us were taught to be afraid of mistakes. But mistakes are really just “mis—steps”. These can be invaluable learning experiences and great feedback for us. Think about it.  Mistakes are a natural part of any learning experience.  If we never made mistakes (or were unwilling to allow ourselves to make them), we would be unable to ever learn anything new. 

I believe infidelity is always a mistake.  It’s a misguided attempt to get the love we want… from the wrong source.  Therefore, infidelity calls for correction (and better insight into its cause).  It does NOT call for punishment, blame or shame. Conscious awareness of this distinction can be the difference between couples who make it and couples who do not.

Here are the key things to remember:

Passion” and “love” are not the same.  Most of the couples I have coached, never really think of this difference. They often tell me they never considered how passion is NOT love. And how the two don’t always show up together.  I believe it's because many of us have been "mis-educated”.  Fairytales, romance novels and movies try to paint an illusionary picture of love and passion being automatically attached like Siamese twins. But in reality, we know this is often NOT the case.  I’m sure you have known people who you loved, but felt NO sexual passion for. Then there have been those who you were not in love with, but you felt a tremendous amount of sexual passion for.

People know… (especially women) there are moments in your life when you can be in love with a person and and NOT feel like making love to them.

Think about it like this.

Love and passion are a lot like peanut butter and jelly.  Different, yes. But best when enjoyed together.  It’s helpful when you begin to see "love and passion" as two separate experiences.  Look at it this way:  Love can bloom eternal.  But Passion is more like a fire. If left unattended, it will eventually go out. 

Don’t let anyone fool you…

Creating Relationship Happiness is not a gift from the gods. It doesn’t come from having good luck or a great childhood. It emerges from acceptance of "the way things are today". (Not the way they used to be OR the way someone told you they ought to be.) In other words, YOU are the person defines relationship happiness for you. 

Listen. It’s your relationship. You can make it as exciting (or as tender) as you want. But part of what I’ve learnt...passion and romance plays a HUGE ROLE in keeping any monogamous relationship “Infidelity Proof”. 

PASSIONATE MONOGAMY™ SECRETS
EVERY MARRIED WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

(To keep his love, attention, affection & interest...for life.)

ATTENTION MARRIED WOMEN: There are no words to sufficiently express the amount of pain and anguish a woman experiences when she first realizes her husband is losing interest in her.

For most men, sex remains a high priority for life.

I once had a friend, Bill, who was still flirting with the ladies, way past his 89th birthday. (And I am talking about young stuff… 68, 70, 73). The point I am making is this.  For men, nothing substitutes for sex or replaces passion. (Not career, kids, or awards). Sex serves as both a relief and a medicine for the pressures of life. Without sex, a man’s life normally feels incomplete.

I think it's time (and smart) for women to not only respect the male’s sexuality – but to hold a reverence for it.

Are men secretly MORE romantic than women?

There’s an old saying that eager girls get more love than pretty girls.

It’s a crude way of pointing out what men find irresistible. For him, there’s a huge difference between being “needed” and being “wanted”. For a man, romance is that feeling of being totally wanted, welcomed, and admired. Attention, affection and appreciation are his mental aphrodisiac’s. Every married woman should use this knowledge to her advantage. Here's the reality. If he doesn't get them from you, he may very well get them somewhere else.

Here’s one more thing I want to share with you.

All men have difficulties revealing themselves. (Don’t worry. Your guy isn’t the only one.)

"When women get into relationships – they expand.
When men get into relationships – they contract."

Men have natural “do not enter” warning signs to protect their feelings. To the masculine mind… intimacy means risk. And disclosure equals pain.  So how can you get your man to relax, open up and connect more emotionally with you?

Here are Two Ways to Inspire a Man to Open Up

ONE: Give him his “space”.
TWO: Listen without judgment.  

Deep down, most men worry that if women knew what they were really thinking and feeling, they would “flip-out”.  And with good reason. That's because many women would flip out. (and often do). Women have a tendency to ask men for honesty, then punish them when it’s not what they want to hear.

Here it is once again. (Just in case you missed it.)

The key to more intimacy with any man... is the ability to cultivate an atmosphere of non-judgment.  I’ll admit.  Sometimes this CAN be tough even for me to do. But trust me, the rewards are worth the price. (Bite your tongue if you have to.)

Here are two key differences between men and women:

Women want men to “listen and not fix”.
Men want women to “listen and not judge”.

One last thing.

No woman is designed to be passive. If you want to live your best life, you must be willing to awaken more passion. And remember, passion is not something you create... it’s energy you release.

It’s not a matter of making something new, but of unblocking the obstacles to its natural flow. Passion is important to women because it washes away inhibitions and fears like the sea washes away the sand. Passion is what allows us to enter into our natural state of openness with a man.

And what’s more…

Given the right circumstances,  EVERY woman (including YOU) sits on top of a volcano of “passionate energy” that could erupt at any moment. It WANTS to be released. The unnatural thing to do is to suppress it.

The bottom line?

Your marriage can be one of the most beautiful experiences of your life.

And I’ve discovered over the past several years, we don’t have to make each other prisonors in order to do sustain monogamy. Each one of us has the power (and the choice) to make our relationships better OR to make them worse. It’s up to us to use our unlimited powers of creativity, sensuality and imagination to inspire our partners (and ourself) to have everything we desire (and more).

PASSIONATE MONOGAMY™ SECRETS
EVERY MARRIED MAN SHOULD KNOW

(To keep her totally satisfied at home.)

WHAT WOMEN WANT

I read an article the other day that said there’s another man waiting in the wings for every woman. I don’t know if this is true.  But it certainly serves as a great reminder of how important it is NOT  to take your wife for granted.  In one way, she is totally unique. And yet, in another way, she’s just like other women.  She wants to experience the thrills of being romanced by one man. The key to creating Passionate Monogamy™ in YOUR marriage is...for you to make sure that one man... IS YOU (and stays you).

And that brings us to the secret of what women want.

EVERY WOMAN “LONGS” TO FALL IN LOVE AGAIN

She wants to re-experience the rush, the giddiness, the tingles, the giggles, the anticipation, the intensity. (Why do you think romance novels, account for 51% OF ALL BOOKS SOLD?) Here’s why. It’s because they “virtually” deliver those same feelings to her again and again. But trust me. She doesn’t want it from a book.  She wants it with YOU!

How can you use this information to your advantage?

Simple. Stop thinking of her as your wife or partner.  And start to thinking of her as her lover. And, begin to ask yourself questions like… “What can I do to inspire more of her desire?”

Let me help you.

How to Inspire Her Desire

Her desire for sex can never be “forced”. (and yet, it can be inspired)

It’s all about the “right words”. For women, (ALL WOMEN) sex begins in the imagination. (and believe me when I tell you... every woman has a wild imagination.

That’s why…

There are no bad lovers – only uninspiring ones.

Success with any woman (including your wife) comes down to your ability to capture and lead her imagination.  This is THE MASTER KEY to inspiring her sexual desires.  Just like a romance novelist knows — it’s all about the right words AND the right time — to stir up her sexual feelings and flood her with an insatiable amount of desire to connect with you.

Suzie’s recipe for inspiring her desire:

1. APPROACH WITH CONFIDANCE. (Never “beg” or "justify" your desire)
2. Let her know that she is safe and in control. (keep coming back to this)
3. Create an “emotional connection” using non-sexual affection.
4. Make sure she knows it is HER you want...not just sex.
5. Use humor to charm and disarm any resistance or reluctance she may have.
6. DEEPEN your voice and speak SLOWER to her.
7. Look FULLY into her eyes.
8. Use your words to get her imagining herself having fun, being pleased and experiencing pleasure with you. (ALL BEFORE YOU TOUCH HER)

Here’s another BIG insight into women I want to share with you.

“Deep inside”... a woman is never 100% certain of her appeal. (Yes. Even super models have insecurities.) In HER mind, she silently wonders: “Is it me he wants or is it just sex?”   That’s why “better sex techniques” and “exotic sex positions” are NEVER the answer to female sexual happiness. The secret... is in knowing how to inspire more of her desire by using her imagination as your ultimate secret weapon. 
 
And one more thing you should know about your woman:

For her, trust is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

It’s your integrity, strength and "willingness to do what you say" – and - "say what you mean" - that makes it easy for her to surrender to you.

To have the her complete trust, you must practice radical honesty. Here’s my definition of radical honesty. It's when, "what you say"doesn’t conflict with "what you feel".

Make it your practice to be impeccable with your word. It's like the "Yaqui Indian Sage", Don Juan, advised his protégée, Carlos Castaneda, in the book The Art of Dreaming...

"To be impeccable, means, to “put your life on the line” in order to 'back up' your decisions”.

Do this…and I promise you’ll find her trust, admiration and desire for you, growing over the years…gathering momentum like a giant snowball storming down a mountain.

Now Back to Passionate Monogamy.

Let me ask you.

Knowing what you NOW know…

ARE YOU READY TO LEARN MORE ABOUT
CREATING PASSIONATE MONOGAMY ™  ?

Stop! (and really THINK ABOUT that question).

Are you willing to see your relationship, yourself and your partner in a new light?

Are you willing to re-design THIS RELATIONSHIP — in such a way — that you both find it fulfills your wildest, deepest desires?

Are you willing to learn how to be satisfied with one? And to allow that one to learn how to truly satisfy you?

Here’s why I ask.

As much as couples "SAY"... they want more a passionate marriage (or a more loving relationship) — very few are willing to learn what it takes to create that relationship.

A lot of my friends ask me why that is. Well, I will tell you, exactly what I tell them.

"I believe it’s because passionate monogamy entails a certain amount of risk. It goes way beyond the traditional concepts of “right and wrong”. It requires couples to wake up to the reality of what it means to truly create loving relationships."

Embracing Passionate Monogamy also requires a certain amount of courage, "willingness to learn" and "willingness to grow closer" as a result of that learning. This can be a very scary to notion to a lot of people who would rather live in mediocrity... than risk change.

My most successful couples tell me... because Passionate Monogamy required them to be so radically honest and intimate with each other - they found it to be one of the primary reasons they have been able to sustain such happiness together.

I have an intuition about you.

The fact that you have read this article all the way through to here, tells me you are willing to learn... whatever it is you need... in order to get the results you want.

Congratulations!  You have already taken a giant step in the right direction.  (And you are way ahead of most people).  Yet, it is STILL not enough to just learn. One must also experience the reality of relationship success.

Here’s the best part.

Part of having a better relationship — is having the desire — to have a better relationship. 

Did you know, it only takes a single moment for happiness to sneak into your life? That’s right.  Anything can be used as a surprise breakthrough. A new element can come in at any moment and change the destiny of your relationship — in a heartbeat.

Are you open to truly being happy?

There’s really only one reason to ACTUALLY create Passionate Monogamy ™ in your relationship. 

That’s because it will increase your happiness to do it.

I challenge you…

...to make today the day YOU make quantum leaps in your happiness. One way you can do that is by learning the secrets to creating Passionate Monogamy and opening the way for more passion, intimacy and romance to blossom like wildflowers in YOUR relationship.

Because when it comes right down to it…

You might wonder, imagine, ponder or fantasize about the idea of having a better marriage. (and a more loving relationship) But, it won’t be until you feel, understand and "experience it yourself"... that it becomes true for you.

If you're now ready for a relationship breakthrough...

Then I suggest you book your free 30-minute consultation and find out for yourself, if my 6-week Passionate Monogamy ™ class, is right for you and your partner.

Also, here are some resources that will help you...

You CAN have all you ever wanted in THIS relationship. (and more) You simply have to know what it is you want, how to ask for it AND how to inspire your partner to give it to you.

My step-by-step process shows you the way.

It’s fun, entertaining and highly effective in helping committed couple’s (like you and your partner) to create the kind of relationships you truly want to have.

Now, isn’t that worth learning how to do?

Then take a deep breath. (now breathe) and click here to register for your FREE 30 minute consultation and let the journey begin TODAY!

Until we speak again,

Remeber... Love Wins!

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